The other night, day 3,076 of flu in my house, I was flicking through Instagram (apparently trying to keep my insomnia kick going). Green smoothie. Sweaty miles. Core work. Champagne. European cafe. More core work. I felt deflated and an ugly shade of green. Personally, I hadn't washed my hair in five days, and my main activity had been offering my two year old a list of drinks while she said no, no, no in the most heartbreaking monotone. I couldn't sleep, even once she was back in her own bed, because of my over-active anxiety about her breathing. Every sound in the house a signal for me to go check on her. Since December 26th my family has had the flu. It's January 16 and I think we're finally on the other side.

My December of getting strong and balanced wrapped and it was time to start building back. Motivation hasn't been hard to find, but momentum has felt impossible. Every time I stack even two days together they get knocked over. My base building is looking a lot like PJ playing with her giant Legos. 

One selfish positive (knocking on ALL THE WOOD) is that I didn't get it. Not round 1, 2, 3 or 4. It's me and my Lysol against the world. My stomach took a detour one night and I couldn't sleep because of the cramping, but the morning came and it got better. Just a couple days of not being able to eat much more than plain toast. I knocked two days off the schedule but did run 2 miles for sanity one of the nights after bedtime, feeling like a weak little kitten. 

The last week I wrote in my Compete Journal was 12/26. Intention? "Don't get the flu! Run to feel energized, not depleted." Unwritten, don't completely give up even when it's not going well. Luckily I've done work on that life lesson during marathons and marathon training. It came in handy. Finally being able to look at the last three weeks, I only knocked one easy day and one workout off the schedule while full-time momming, nursing, cleaning, client working...and I'm calling that a big win. And an essential win, since running definitely was my lifeline after a long day. It was energizing, not depleting.

A fresh start isn't essential for progress, a messy start does count. Still you know I'll be celebrating the Lunar New Year, Lysol in hand. Happy New Year round two!


  1. Sounds like a huge win to me. A start is a start, messy or clean. :)

  2. Using you as motivation to get back on the momentum train. Nursing my 10 month old All. Night. Long. has taken it's toll mentally and physically. Momming while trying to be a runner too can be really hard.

  3. Life is messy! Looks like you handled that messy start really well- glad your daughter is starting to feel better!

  4. I love reading your blog because you are so refreshingly real. Life as a mom is hard, even harder when you actually want to accomplish anything during the day other than being a mom. Working and running and momming and wifing (def not a word!) is so tough. I am glad everyone is feeling better! I hope you need less lysol really soon!


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